Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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