But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
