i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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