Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
