I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize