make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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