does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize