Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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