Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
