Me. At least after what I've been through.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
