omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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