at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize