So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
