You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
