I just made out with a guy for $7.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
