we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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