Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i would punch a child for taco bell
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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