i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize