There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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