check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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