well most of my day revolves around power hour
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
