why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
