We're facebook friends in real life
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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