I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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