i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
