My hair reeks of homosexuality.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
