i barfeds in our rink
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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