You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
