Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
