if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
