guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
