Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
