If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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