Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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