I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
it was like eating out sand paper
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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