Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Randomize