I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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