I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
