In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
