she looked like the before picture.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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