We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
