I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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