The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
