no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
