i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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