I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize