Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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