they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
