Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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