How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
wow bdsm is so cute
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
