I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
